Dude, Where's My Zone: A Year in the Life of Bad Software
Today is the day I stop caring. Yesterday, and all the days before that, I was never going to write a book. I never had the time, talent, or experience to convey anything meaningful to the greater public. I still don't.
But that won't stop me, because I officially couldn't give a hoot anymore. I have spent two years working in places which purport to create software, and all I have found is that I have landed in time-wasting harbors of dross which are awash in free corporate bucks. I am finally ready for my life to be a lesson to others in what never to do and where never to go.
Namely, don't go into technology today thinking it is some sort of place that values efficiency or intelligence. Fritter your dreams away on something else, or know that you are entering a socialist wasteland of big egos fluffing out little brains.
Where else but in technology could a system which could have been written by two competent programmers be painstakingly churned out by "30" man teams abroad, and have to endure an approval process as long as many small animals' lifespans? Or where could one find applications that started life as decently complex -- but altogether straightforward -- spreadsheets supported by 4 business users become the bane of a group of 50 vicious and dull people?
My year has been infested with methodology, paranoia, bureaucracy, incompetence, slander, indifference, naked aggression, and more. In fact, my year has been filled with more psychological, intellectual, and technical dysfunction than I have ever witnessed in my entire life. To cap it all off, I have not seen a single project deliver a complete product, however small, on time and to requirements.
Welcome to my year.
But that won't stop me, because I officially couldn't give a hoot anymore. I have spent two years working in places which purport to create software, and all I have found is that I have landed in time-wasting harbors of dross which are awash in free corporate bucks. I am finally ready for my life to be a lesson to others in what never to do and where never to go.
Namely, don't go into technology today thinking it is some sort of place that values efficiency or intelligence. Fritter your dreams away on something else, or know that you are entering a socialist wasteland of big egos fluffing out little brains.
Where else but in technology could a system which could have been written by two competent programmers be painstakingly churned out by "30" man teams abroad, and have to endure an approval process as long as many small animals' lifespans? Or where could one find applications that started life as decently complex -- but altogether straightforward -- spreadsheets supported by 4 business users become the bane of a group of 50 vicious and dull people?
My year has been infested with methodology, paranoia, bureaucracy, incompetence, slander, indifference, naked aggression, and more. In fact, my year has been filled with more psychological, intellectual, and technical dysfunction than I have ever witnessed in my entire life. To cap it all off, I have not seen a single project deliver a complete product, however small, on time and to requirements.
Welcome to my year.
posted by Little Green Potato at 8:12 PM
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